Two Words

1) Blotto
2) Liar

Here's Why: Paula Abdul Breaks Her Nose Boozing.

The exact same situation happened in front of my parent's house to one of my mother's friends. She got boozed and broke her nose on the curb and said she tripped over her dog. To her credit it was a big dog and not a chihuawhatever. They need to remake Sunset Blvd. and star Paula Abdul and that fucker Constantine (or future Kato Kaelin as he should be known).