Finally, the Future is Here

Private jet packs, bitch.

I have a theory that the reason there is even a right wing of the population that has chosen Jesus over science is due to the disillusionment with the scientific community because of its failure to provide us with a jet pack by 2000. Well, now that we have personal jetpacks available, they can put down the Jesus juice and come back to us from all their abracadabra bullshit. Logic vs. magic. Come on people.

There are a some drawbacks to jetpacks, however. For now, the price of $155,000 is a slight hurdle and that's for the cheap one. Currently, there is only 30 seconds of hangtime on available jetpacks. That is not near enough time to jetpack to work. Lastly, the idea of strapping a tank of jet fuel or propane to one's back evokes the phrase "What could go wrong?" in bright neon letters in my head.

Other good news is that this is the first step towards getting me a fully functioning lightsaber. If we are tinkering with jet packs, someone is working on a lightsaber, or laser sword for N00bs, in their garage.

Basically, if I had a jetpack and a lightsaber, I would have no more excuses for not completing any goal I have ever set for myself. Wait, I need a jetpack, a lightsaber, a bear cub, and a subscription to Cat Fancy. That would do it.